It was the late 1800s, Jackson, MS. He was fired by the church where he had served as pastor. The man left the familiar confines of that church: Mt. Helm Baptist Church. His new church? An empty store. His pulpit? An empty counter. His parishioner? Maybe you, if you were African-American and living then.

Charles P. Jones was the first known African-American hymnist in the States. Born in Rome, Georgia, his father died when he was young, and his mother passed on when he was age 17.

Following the demise of his mother, Jones traveled across the south. He settled in Arkansas, where he committed himself to Christ. Before long, he was licensed as a preacher. Though a popular preacher, Jones sensed something was missing.

I was pastor of the Tabernacle Baptist Church, Selma, Alabama, and my ministry with that church ... seemed to be accepted and much loved. But as I read my Bible and observed conditions, I felt that we were not, as a brother once said to me, "toting fair with Jesus." I began then to seek Him with all my heart for that power that would make my life wholly His. ... I fasted and prayed for three days and nights. He then sanctified me sweetly in His love. ... The earnestness of the Spirit was mine. I was sealed in Him unto the day of Redemption. The blessing of God rested upon me - all on the merits of Christ. ... For in myself I felt more unworthy and undone than ever. It was the nearness, the eminence, the reality of the presence of God that exalted my spirit and filled me with joy, the joy of the Holy Ghost.

Jones became the pastor of the Mt. Helm Baptist Church, in Jackson, MS. There his teachings caused much opposition. He wrote: "I was looked on as a fanatic by some; by others as weak in brain.”

There, during the conflict and intense criticism, Jones suffered a great tragedy. His 4-year-old daughter was burned in a fire; later, she died. Soon afterward, he was fired from the church.

Then, we pick up the story. We see a man who does not relinquish his calling. He finds a new venue, unconfined by the strictures of those unable or unwilling to receive his gifts. How ironic, then, that he is remembered still, and we still sing his hymn “Deeper, Deeper” in churches - the very venue that considered him un-fit to serve.

So, how was it that Jones had a vitality undeterred by such opposition and casting aside? Well, listen to the words of his hymn. They, with his testimony above of the blessing of the Spirit, show clearly a person grounded in the atmosphere of Grace:

Deeper, deeper in the love of Jesus
Daily let me go;
Higher, higher in the school of wisdom,
More of grace to know.

Deeper, deeper, blessèd Holy Spirit,
Take me deeper still,
Till my life is wholly lost in Jesus,
And His perfect will.

Deeper, deeper! though it cost hard trials,
Deeper let me go!
Rooted in the holy love of Jesus,
Let me fruitful grow.

Deeper, higher, every day in Jesus,
Till all conflict past,
Finds me conqu’ror, and in His own image
Perfected at last.

Deeper, deeper in the faith of Jesus,
Holy faith and true;
In His pow’r and soul exulting wisdom
Let me peace pursue.

Refrain
O deeper yet, I pray,
And higher every day,
And wiser, blessèd Lord,
In Thy precious, holy Word.

Jesus speaks in the John Gospel, “And the one who sent me is with me - he has not deserted me. For I always do what pleases him.” Despite the oppositions and weariness Jesus faced, he affirms his sense of the Presence of the Divine. “With me” speaks of closeness, untouched by human opinions. “Not deserted me” speaks of the same. Jesus knows himself to be companioned by Spirit, not left alone.

Why, though, this close communion between Jesus and the One he calls “Father”? How does this intimacy evidence? Says Christ, “I always do what pleases him.” Jesus recognizes his communion with the “Father” arises from and strengthens desire to please the Spirit.

And there is the link between Jesus, persons like Jones, and you and me. We all long to be near to the Heart of God. We know that something is missing, regardless of how religious or spiritual we claim to be, or how moral and dutiful, if we are not living intimately with God.

God wills to captivate our hearts. When God captures our heart, we will find ourselves returning repeatedly to surrender to pleasing Grace. We may veer off course often, but we will return to that one Purpose. God will honor that. The Divine will guide us to ways and places to serve, for God can trust us to be faithful to keep the one Purpose of “Deeper, Deeper.”

Then, our consuming passion will no longer be religion or spirituality as usual. We will no longer bow to so-called sacred structures of faith and creed. We will use religion and all as a means to “Deeper, Deeper.” We will readily throw aside the rest, and we will not fear if anyone throws us aside for taking too seriously a resolve to live and share with others more deeply the Light of Grace.

Recently, after 10 years of service, my present denomination informed me I do not "fit" - not my church, who supports me strongly, but others in the denomination who "okay" or "not okay" local pastors. My calling and gifts were affirmed, but I do not fit, I was told, as a pastor in the denomination. I was given three months to find work and a place to live.

I will be serving in another venue, for calling does not depend on persons, but the Caller. The place and means of serving can change. And who knows? Possibly, God used these men and women to move me on to where I can fulfill my calling more fully.

Do I grieve? No. I do not fit - whatever was meant. Yet, any man or woman with a consuming passion for the Divine and to serve persons in a singular focus of Love, whose aspiration echoes the words of “Deeper, Deeper,” will not fit in much organized religion - if any. Indeed, living in the Spirit and "fit" may be antithetical terms, logical contradictions.

Surely, much religion has become materialistic, functional, and cut off from the power of Life. Do we have even a majority who bear truly the inner urge and vivid sensation that drove Jones to prayer and fasting, the sense of something missing that must be found and lived, or the soul will desperately seek until it is given it?

There is a vista of Spirit we have never seen, thought, known, but to have this we must keep going “Deeper, Deeper,” and without care for fitting in to religion, spirituality, or anything other than the one over-riding, all-consuming passion exemplified in the words:

Deeper, Deeper, blessed Holy Spirit,
Take me deeper still,
Till my life is wholly lost in Jesus,
And His perfect will.

Is it possible Spirit is wanting to awaken us to experiences not even located on the religious map of what we have considered possible? Is it possible that many ecclesiastical structures are designed against "Deeper, Deeper," preaching and teaching shallow waters, when the soul of many longs for the depths? Could it be that many no longer enter the doors of churches for they have not found the depths to which their hearts longed, even though they do not know how to name that longing? Could it be that clerics are primarily responsible for giving the masses feel-good, do-good religion but not introducing them to the mystery, passion, and power of Spirit?

To give this introduction, Spirit must be lived in and through the person. Programs, sermons, lessons, prayer, and sacraments are not enough to quench the thirst of the masses for God. The one who says "I am a Christian leader" is to be, must be, intoxicated with Christ and breathing in and out Eternal Life, now. He or she must be one who neither does nor wishes to fit in to anything but that singular Passion. That one cannot, must not, barter away this Passion in the trivialities of religious niceties or the shallowness of spiritualities that are designed to promise us blessings that are, rather, denials of the self-oblation Spirit calls us to embody in self-giving for the world.

Do you want to get lost? Then, get lost in Divine Love. Pray not to be partly lost, pray to become wholly lost. Pray to lose yourself totally, to find Love fully. Pray this, not that you may simply enjoy God, or get heavenly bliss on earth. Pray this that you will be a walking and talking embodiment of “Deeper, Deeper.” If you do, you will not fit in any ecclesiastical structure, but you will fit where it is most important. You will fit in a world desperately looking for men and women to convince them God is real, faith is sure, Love is all that matters, and God is much more than has been lived and shown to them. You will show others the Divine is not subject to the claims of human institutions that claim a monopoly on Grace and salvation. You will show the ways of humans, however sacred, cannot contain or constrict the Way of God.

So, do not wait for the confirmation of others. They may or may not “confirm” you. Finally, such does not matter. What you need, we all need, is an inner confirmation that only the divine Spirit gives. And a confirmation that deepens with surrender, at ever more embracing levels of Life.

And that is what persons need from you - the presence of the Holy Spirit. They do not need you to fit in - Jesus did not. They do not need your credentials, Jesus had none framed on a wall. They do not need your ecclesiastical endorsement, Jesus had not one such. They do not need your eloquence, Jesus spoke in the language of the common people. They do not need your religious obsessions, those who had them when Jesus lived ranted against him until he died on a cross.

What do persons need? What can you give? - “More grace to know.” - All other, however esteemed by humans, is rubbish for the trash dump of human vanity, dry straw blowing in the wind of arrogance.

So, when your heart longs for something more of God and to be something more for others, you can find encouragement in an outcast who preached the passion of his soul in an abandoned store.